Guilty Pleasures 2.1 or my ESPN does not work, give me a break!

when i have extra time in the morning my wife and i usually watch sportscenter on ESPN. we like to catch scott van pelt dropping tenacious d references or the dry wit of neil everett (these two are by far our favorite anchor team). on this particular morning i had about 20 minutes before i had to get ready for work. i turned on the tv and dialed up ESPN to watch sportscenter. it turns out that COX, our ever-reliable cable provider, would not grace us with ESPN this morning. it was not simply a blank screen but it gave us the "you have not bought this channel, call us at 1-800-COX to order ESPN" message. on a separate note, COX has been turning off our cable box at random times to keep things exciting. this is a special service you can get FOR FREE, but only from COX. it gets really fun and crazy when you are trying to watch a DCU v. Chicago Fire game and the cable box goes out right before your team gets scored on. anyway, COX is not a guilty pleasure it is merely guilty.

so ESPN was not working and i needed to watch something for the next 20 minutes. i flipped through the channels and found what i was looking for.

it brought back (full disclosure: i freudian slipped the first time i typed this and wrote 'broke back' instead of 'brought back' by mistake, oops) a lot of good memories. early 90's fashion was so awesome. i think that i will start wearing my suit jacket with the sleeves rolled up. i love suits, but now i can really tailor them to fit my fashion sense.

i sure hope that zack and kelly end up together. in the episode this morning they decided to date other people. what that really meant was that zack was trying to get with the new nurse, but then she tricked him into wanting kelly back. but it was too late, damn that melvin nerdly!

who knew that a true friend would have told AC Slater when he was really not that great on KATY, Bayside High School's radio station, instead of letting him read it in the school paper? i was not able to finish the second episode that came on, but i sure hope that they can save the Max from being turned into a parking lot.

if, and only if, your ESPN is not working check out TBS in the morning.

who is hallam foe?

as i have discussed previously, i am a sucker for coming of age stories. there is a new movie coming out by director david mackenzie called HALLAM FOE. from my limited interaction with a sort of production turned marketing blog and hallam's myspace (which is kind of cool that he has a spot on "the porch" in character) it appears to be a darker coming of age story. i like dark. dark seems real. maybe that's just pessimism, but i tend to learn more from the dark. the best description i have found of what i think the movie will be like is at gapingvoid. hugh at gaping void spent some time living with the director when they were younger. their experience, i believe, directly feeds the movie:

This summer was the first time for both of us being on our own without family or adult supervision, making money and let's say [cough], meeting women. Proper women, not schoolgirls. Up until this time, we'd both had girlfriends and all, but this was when we both started... how do you say... climbing up the sexual learning curve by having experiences with older women. Which, believe me, was a totally different scene from dating the respectable young "gells" from Edinburgh's finest private schools, which had up till then been our only experience with the fairer sex.

And this vibe is what Hallam Foe is about. Forget the plot details, Hallam Foe leaves home and starts having experiencing older women, in the Biblical sense. That's what the movie is really about. Coming-of-Age for boys is a very paradoxical phase of life. We're still kids, and yet, we're not. And for Dave and myself, it was these rather random, strangely existential experiences with older women who ushered us through that phase.

go to gapingvoid to read the rest of this post. it is really quite interesting. i will continue to follow hallam foe's path. i would really like to get to know who he is. at the very least i know he is the kid from billy elliot, so it cannot be all bad.

Real Suck Lake's Jeff Cunningham

as the DC United v. Real Salt Lake game approaches, i thought it appropriate to spotlight one of the bad guys. as if we needed any more fuel, this should add a little more to saturday's fire (no not chicago's fire, let's not speak of them right now).

Dear MLS and American sports fans,

"I have no problems with anything that's been said of me. It's been said all my career. I think people fancy me. They can't figure me out. I'm an attractive guy. I make good money and I score goals. I'm the kind of guy I believe people love. And, at the same time, they can't figure out why they love me so much, so they decide to hate me." (rest of the article, read up Ackerman)

Delusionaly yours,

JC

it is almost as if Jeff thinks there are not enough T.O.s in American futbol. i do not know about you guys but the reason i hate him is because i loved him too much and i could not for the life of me figure out why.

(thanks to kali for bringing this to my attention and i hope you will not be too humiliated by losing to our reserve team on saturday).

Hustle and Putt

I am not a golfer. In the past I have been know to refer to the game of golf as "a rich white man's sport." At my current place of employment, upper management has made a recent habit of putting in the hallways. Last week when the power went out (which it tends to do on a monthly basis) they set up a 25 foot putting competition. I watched as each of my colleagues grossly over or under estimated their putting attempts. One fellow's closest attempt hit a kind lady in the foot about 10 feet behind the putting cup. My associates taunted me and offered me the putter. I politely declined each offer. I do not mind embarrassing myself on the internet, but at work I try to maintain a certain cool composure. All of these men are golf guys. You know the kind, various golf memorabilia on their office walls. You can catch them actually watching the PGA tournaments on their computers at work. These guys dedicate spring/summer/fall weekends to improving their "short game" (whatever that means). I did not have a chance against them. I have not even played miniature golf in over a year. Their incessant badgering and peer pressure finally worked. I stepped on to the "green" (actually a weird like navy blue checked brown carpet, you know, like office carpet always looks).

I decided to get it over with quickly so I teed up and took my first stroke with no practice swing. The ball gently rolled towards the cup and IT WENT IN! Surely this was beginner's luck. BUT NO! I went on to sink 4 out of 5 putts. I was easily the best putter in the building. My associates were amazed and worried about me hustling them in a variety of other activities. Who knew that a simple task such as putting could strike fear into the hearts of men? Men do not like to have an inferior beat them at their own game (see also: Saturday Soccer Matches). I do already have the putting game down, how hard can the rest of it be? I will just practice up on my "short game" and I should be destroying my work mates on the links in no time.

I already have the "white man" part down, perhaps the "rich" part only comes after playing the sport. I am definitely willing to find out.

Gypsy Punk Cabaret

Presenting, Gogol Bordello with front man Eugene Hutz in Start Wearing Purple.

I urge you to see the movie Everything is Illuminated. Mr. Hutz provides us with one of the funniest and most endearing performances of all time. You will not be disappointed. Elijah Woods takes the lead and does pretty well himself. Not only is it funny, but also enlightening and touching. Go rent it! Now!