Wednesday, August 25, 2004

by some ungodly cataclysmic event, i won

so i have been in this argument with an acquaintance of mine for about 6 months now. it goes back and forth, month to month. i hate you, i hate you not. to be honest, i'm running out of petals. luckily in this day and age, argument can be conducted electronically and we never have to see each other. the part where it starts to get weird is this: i'm not contributing to the argument. i don't say a word, not only do i not say a word but i don't type or write or anything else a word either. i feel bad for not participating in this power struggle because it is not my intention to hurt them by making them look ridiculous. i just wanted to announce that this month by some ungodly cataclysmic event, i won. go me. urggghhh...

Zach's Blog

He is seriously so funny. I encourage everyone to go check out his Garden State blog.

I've heard one **** before, but ever since I heard the second one I've had this insatiable desire to rob a liquor store and refer to all women as "ho's".
-Zachary Braff

Monday, August 23, 2004

"Your mom goes to college."

Two movies of the summer that you may or may not MUST SEE.

Napoleon Dynamite- A fantasy boy in his fantastic world. The first movie I have ever seen more than once in the theater. I've seen it three times. Maybe I should find it bootlegged. The real reason I keep going back, besides it being the tightest spot between a queer and a cowboy (thanks bobby), is so that I can take more people. There are certain things that should be shared with loved ones, Napoleon is one of them. In today's popular culture we are fond of quoting movies to the delight of our associates. If anything, this movie is quotable. In fact, every single line from this movie is a valid soundbite, it's just that vivid and memorable. It's pretty much the best movie ever made. It's weird, it's creepy, it's clean to an extreme, and it's hilarious. MTV's Kurt Loder called it a "revelation." I call it another installment in movies that succeed because of their skewed, ridiculous view of "cool."
Mount Bensuvius Rating: 7.5 VEI* (Super Colossal approaching Mega Colossal)

The Garden State- Starring Zachary Braff and Natalie Portman. You know the guy from Scrubs? Well this is his baby. He wrote and directed it. It has his humor written all over it. And that is a good thing. It's New Jersey and suburbia. It's everyone you know that never moved out, that never went to college, and still parties with the high school kids. To sum it up, it's about everyone that never moved on. So what if that's me. Maybe that's why I liked it so much. Hilarity only describes half of the movie. The other half is touching (it touched me, and no it wasn't inappropriate touching) and inspirational. Touching because we can all relate to the inability to communicate with other human beings and the difficulty of opening up to said beings. Thankfully self deprecation can be a great communicator.
Mount Bensuvius Rating: 7 VEI* (Super Colossal)

*Volcanic Explosivity Index (Read more here)

Thursday, August 19, 2004


no one will find us in this

how come you started a lap ahead?

Yes we all get the opportunity to jump the 43rd hurdle on the 5th lap, but some of us start at the 42nd hurdle thereby making the 43rd a lot easier to tackle. Others of us start at the Starting Line and have to run a mile and 42 other hurdles first, making that 43rd, or even the 10th for that matter, nearly impossible to jump.

"Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple. "
Barry Switzer

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

the cliche' king

does anything come out of your mouth that hasn't been reduced, reused, and recycled? environmentally friendly you may be... but where is the original content that i paid for?

used to be a killer, best killer in the land...

it is not the many, but the one. it is not the quantity, but the quality. it only takes one to shut us down. one day, one event can cause us to retire. after you have perfected what it is you do, what is there left to do? the smell of competition, the taste of winning... no longer brings me pleasure. everything you hold close is negotiable. it is done.

...she was the most beautiful thing that i have ever killed.

Tuesday, August 03, 2004


"If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity."
Bill Vaughan

Monday, August 02, 2004

The Cure August 6, 2004

I have an extra ticket for the show on August 6. That means this Friday. If anyone is interested let me know.