Thursday, March 18, 2004

The Love Below

You know... attempting a year without hate is like attempting to birth an alien baby. True, it doesn't sound that difficult but did you know that the gestation period for an alien baby in a human womb is upwards of 3 and a half years? Secondly, I am the one birthing the baby and that means I HAVE NO WOMB! So in order to nurture and care for my offspring I must house it in my gut. That's RIGHT! No more mysteries here. Many of you have asked yourselves, "Why did Logan gain 40 lbs. in 4 months after his two year voyage into 'South America' and is still unable to shed the weight?" Well my good friends, it's all in the nature of bearing an alien child. In actuality I never made it to Argentina. Unless you were to convert the word Argentina into numbers and then find the star date and universal location of the same, it would look something like this: 319777E15. Although our human numbers can't really give an accurate reflection of the location, you'll have to put up with what I've shown you. So anyway there I was on this alien planet and I don't really remember much but now I'm pregnant. I guess the point to all of this is that I'm due next month and I'm hoping to have a baby shower. Everyone is invited.

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